A: I’m pretty much just a die-hard sci-fi / fantasy / horror fan who likes to write his own garbage in his spare time. As a teenager, my dream was to become a novelist. I had a one-year plan that’s been extended for fifteen years, but it’s slowly happening. My day job involves fixing computers and designing Web sites. I think it’s that monotony that keeps my brain in a constant daydream state—which is useful when you’re trying to tell stories about aliens, vampires, or breakfast cereal killers.

          A: It was a joke, really. In 2008 Sean Gordon first approached me about possibly doing a film of some sort. We were up late watching cheesy horror movies with a few friends, and at one point we started throwing around stupid ideas for monsters. Someone yelled out, “Oatmeal man!” and we took it from there. We joked about how he would have sucrose for blood, how his moles would become raisins, how he would always have to keep himself just moist enough to get around—but it was all still a joke. It wasn’t until the following year that Sean actually asked me to write the script. I was clipping coupons at the time, so this was a welcome change.

          A: It’s all about fun. Comedy first, horror second. Horror, for me, has always been about the laughs. How cheesy does the zipper on that creature costume look? How dumb is that camp visitor hiding in that outhouse? Regarding cheesiness, I think Darkplace’s Dean Learner said it best: “If you go to a puppet show, you can see the wires. But it’s about the puppets. It’s not about the string.”

          A: I’d done amateur comedy videos before with Sean, Claude (Foster), and Sal (Perales), so I knew *something* would come of the idea, whether it was an actual movie or just a home video we posted on YouTube. The real kicker for me, once filming began, was seeing the Oates Lair for the first time. Sean’s team had done such a great job with the modest resources at hand. As for how well it *works*, that’s really up to the film’s viewers. Both of them.

          A: Most of what I write is social science fiction and urban fantasy. The exceptions are The Oatmeal Man, a dark sci-fi novella I did in 2005 (which I think has been optioned by Pulsar Pictures), and The Knack, my second novel...though that’s more an urban vampire thing than straight-on horror. Does a messy decapitation qualify as horror? In any case, I’m much more of a horror *fan* than a horror writer.

          A: At the moment I’m doing an absurdist comedy series at my Web site called SuperMegaNet. It’s about a video chat program that lets you upload / download to and from people’s homes. The catch is that you can’t turn it off, you can’t uninstall it. I’m also working (slowly) on two more screenplays, one of which is earmarked for Sean...if I can get him drunk enough during the reading. I also have plans for another novel, but that’s a ways off. Maybe after the publishing industry calms down over the whole e-books concept.

          A: I’m not picky. My main goal is to continue telling stories in whatever format I can manage. I’ve had modest success with the small press/independent publishing thing over the last few years; now I’m giving screenwriting a shot. If that’s what takes, then so be it. I’ll ditch novel writing and become a script whore. If that doesn’t work, I’ll make the jump to pornographic greeting cards. And so on.

          A: The last horror flick I watched was Sleepaway Camp. There are two good scenes in the movie. One is the cooking accident; the other is the disturbing twist ending. It had me cringing for all the wrong reasons. As for an obscure horror film people might not have seen, my vote is for Warning Sign. It’s an outbreak / zombie flick that used to play all the time on Saturday afternoon TV. Also worthy of mention: The Stuff (hope you like shaving cream), Chopping Mall / Killbots, Night of the Comet, Lifeforce (it’s all about the screaming corpses), and Dead Heat (zombie cop—nuff said).