Faces of Schlock (2009)

- written March 23rd, 2011

Summary: Join sexy horror hostess Slutpira as she presents four tales of terror from the new generation of low-budget schlock masters!           1) Blood Witch – A twisted Goth girl summons a murderous seventeenth century witch to exact gory revenge on anyone who crosses her path. Directed by Andrew Shearer, starring Monica Puller and Countess Samela.           2) Mike Wuz Here -Night shift workers at an old movie theater are terrorized by the ghost of a former employee who committed suicide in the building. Directed by Justin Channell, starring Josh Lively, Zane Crosby and TJ Rogers.           3) One Foot In The Grave”: When a beautiful young dancer loses one of her feet due to malpractice, she uses black magic to bring the severed appendage back to life. Directed by Chris LaMartina, starring George Stover and Sara Cole.           4) Slay Ride”: Left behind by her family on Christmas eve, a teenage delinquent punk chick quickly becomes surrounded by murder and mayhem. Directed by Henrique Couto, starring Ruby LaRocca and Sandy Behre.           Overall: The film’s websites make comments about the amount of nudity included in here…and there is. Ruby Larocca and her film “Slay Ride” especially. Frankly, that’s the only semi-watchable film here. “Blood Witch” was interesting at the beginning as we watch the 2 roomies with opposite views on life, fight it out but then it got boring. “One Foot” was chock full of “foot puns” and although it was moderately amusing, the jokes got old really fast. “Mike” really just did nothing for me despite its attempt to be funny and humorous. But clearly if you’re gonna watch this, it’s for “Slay Ride.” Not just for the nudity, but for the story as we try and find out who the killer is and what Santa has to do with it all

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